Possible New Venues for Speedway in London – Breaking News!
Rumours have reached a crescendo that the relentless campaign to find a new home for speedway within the capital has identified a couple of exciting new possible stadium targets!
A mystery man close to the search project, a Mr. D. Byrne said, “we are actively considering Upton Park because in recent years work has already taken place to shorten one side of the pitch and it has recently ceased to be viable for its original intended purpose. Plus, every cloud has a silver lining so England’s travails in the qualifying rounds for Euro 2008 means that the Wembley management will possibly face crowd shortfalls for future England games and we believe our innovative proposal to pay a handsome rent to run Conference League speedway in the stadium will create the much needed additional revenues.”
“Obviously we will fly this kite in the press, blather on about planning permission hurdles and transport plus, if need be, we will create an atmosphere of hope mixed with mystery before we talk of an appeal to the Minister for Sport and the European Court of Human Rights so that this sport of Kings can rightfully return to the capital. We are well-prepared since we have detailed plans drawn up on rice paper (sadly now eaten for shareholder confidentiality reasons), a 2002 AA Road Atlas and a London Transport tube map of London with giant arrows pointing at Wembley and Upton Park. We will leave no trumpet unblown (surely ‘stone unturned’ – ed.) in our quest!”
Pressed for further details Mr. Byrne denied he couldn’t face up to the facts, muttered “Qu’est-ce que c’est” before he later added “there’s a party in my mind and I hope it never stops”